Green-Eyed Monster

Provoking Tip #229: The Green-Eyed Monster

When high-waisted shorts on a dude still doesn't cause the average man to tilt his head or raise his brow, try having liquid/oil encased in plastic as a neckline and matching clutch with scalloped edges, while slathering your torso in a repulsive murky-green that resembles a close up shot of cartoon puke. Then slap on some Chevy-inspired green sunnies that give you alien eyes and jam your feet in chunky creeper shoes that make your feet look like irons! This would guarantee to not only provoke but to confuse the average pedestrian.

 

Either mommy dearest chugged one too many caffeinated beverages while she was preggers, or I seriously need to get my blood sugar level checked out, as every so often I get into Hyper Active Mode. The symptoms are machine-gun speed word vomit, incessant public dancing, or A.D.D. twitches that goes so fast I actually vibrate (human vibrator?). But the most common and classic symptom is the urge to pose ridiculously next to purely random things or within forbidden settings. Exhibit A: those cute little "photo machine booths" imported from presumably Japan located within video-game arcades infested with hormonally-suppressed teenage girls and joystick-crazed gameboys. It somewhat resembles a futuristic machine that could teleport to me to the moon (or better yet to Saint-Tropez cause I seriously need a beach vacay). My wayward conduct within the photo booth ended prematurely with the creepy maintenance guy peeping in informing me that I'm not allowed to stand on the machine. I actually almost replied "I'm not standing, I'm posing. Big Diff." But fortunately, I believe my outfit (and inappropriate posing) was provoking enough to distract him, nudging him to retreat while I quickly snapped the shots I needed and bolted. 

top & clutch CHRISTOPHER KANE, sunglasses PRADA, shorts BALENCIAGA, shoes JEFFREY CAMPBELL

Rocking the Boat

Being the provoker that I am, I often find that one of the most provoking aspects of how I dress and carry myself is whenever I adapt something from womenswear and pretty much translate it straight on to moi-self whilst only changing small details here and there (I don't do this on purpose mind you). So though I'm not about to slap on a bikini anytime soon, in this 34 degree humid climate where sweat beads are my newest accessories, I'm damn well gonna skimplify my look aka. bare arms, bare legs, open toes + sunnies. (skimplify: to simplify and to make skimpy) Voilà! My version of something that can still pass of as somewhat fashionable and be able to withstand the scorching weather. What a great excuse: "I'm dressing slutty because it's so hot so excuse me if my bullocks are hanging out... Once they're done getting some air they'd move back up." But seriously, for men, shorts that aren't tight around the hips/thigh can only go so far up as to around mid-thigh, else we'd be serving everyone Bangers and Mash. So taking my skimplified look out of Starbucks and onto the docks, I (without permission) hopped onto the nearest vintage looking boat for a blog worthy pose. Aren't these little wooden boats just the cutest! If I put on a "1977" filter from Instagram on this, it'd look like it's proper VIN-TAGE! Take me to the other side sir and be a dear and top up my mango passionate fruit frappuccino.

sunglasses BOUTIQUE, top SONG ZIO, shorts RAD HOURANI, shoes PUZZLE by PUZZLE

Green With Envy

I'm normally not one to buy into the whole "it' bag trend, and even though I've successfully suppressed my sexual urges to buy the Céline pony hair trapeze or Philip Lim PVC mini-Pashli, I can't hide my woody anymore whenever I lay my eyes on this bottle green Proenza Schouler FW12-3 PS11 shoulder bag (Be glad I didn't get the PS1 guys ok?). Now this is finally a color I could fap to, and I get a hand-gasm every time I stroke the specially treated leather surface. I not-so-innocently tried it on at Lane Crawford while spewing the words "I want this, I want this..." like a broken record. At last, a shoulder bag that enriches my so-called fashion dialog and is sized proportionally to my androgynous body, roomy enough to toss all my daily crap in with just a tee bit more extra space to squeeze in a compact camera for my stalker-azzi days. Plus once I detached the strap, it automatically transforms into... Le clutch mode aka. PAR-TAY mode! (Apologies folks for getting a bit too "excited".)

So guys, what's the verdict: 

YAY or NAY or GAY?

 bag PROENZA SCHOULER

Touchy Subject

I'm a sucker for quirky/new age textiles, especially when a single piece of garment encompasses several of them. I find the quirkier the better, it should be the ones where people make comments like "is that bubble wrap on your shoulders?!". Yes, fabric manipulation and distortion has never been this much fun. It's like texture candy for me, I can't stop touching myself my garment. It's funny how we're attracted to oddity nowadays as the concept of something being simply 'pretty' has gone stale, really stale actually. Two weeks ago, I rummaged through JOYCE's outlet mall at the South Horizon Plaza in Ap Lei Chau. Who'd known I'd find Balenciaga's SS11 ready-to-wear sleeveless teddy shirt cleverly camouflaged amongst the jungle of random printed shirts. I like to call this my bacne shirt not because it resembles something by Balenciaga and Acne, but it literally looks like ripe bacnes ready to get popped! We seriously have problems being attracted by subject matters that normally puts people off. Honestly, the things we like are never 'sexy' (depending who you talk to) as the shirt itself doesn't attenuate any part of the body, leaving arms totally exposed and your torso covered in acne.

shirt & clutch BALENCIAGA, shorts RAD HOURANI, ring MAISON MARTIN MARGIELA, shoes PUZZLE by PUZZLE

Tisci's Taurus

With the flooding of e-mails regarding upcoming fashion month's events (and fashion week schedules being finalized), I've gotta begin planning some show-going outfits (if I ever get invited), and by plan, I do mean buy. Okay, so I got the nose ring, horn earrings and eel skin lapel blazer, I'm a freakin' walking advertisement, so come on Tommy Ton, are you gonna shoot this or what? I'm already giving my best nostril angle, you can already see my brain, just take the shot!

While catching up on favorite fashion blogs, I particularly felt an odd kinship to the hilarious New York blogger Leandra Medine aka. "The Man Repeller". In a way, even as a guy, I'm also a man repeller! Leandra's blog is all about fashion trends that women (and fashionable guys) love, men would hate. So just the other day, while walking with a friend, decked out in a multi-textured sleeveless top, geometric cut shorts and flatform shoes, four guys my age (typical straight boy types) walked by, took one look at me and my flatforms, cringed and bolted. Man repelled? Check! The weird thing is they acted in a way nudging me to respond, but I honestly had no idea what they wanted me to do or say. I should probably tap dance next time or start opera singing just to make things go from awkward to beyond awkward. I find that the better the outfit, the more I repel! I need an assistant to dot notes and help me keep count: "Outfit #486, you've cleared out 6 and half streets of men, looks like your Maison Michele lace headpiece and Mykita X Romain Kremer dome sunnies really did the trick, super repellent!"

clothing & jewellery GIVENCHY

Feeling Nosey

The moment Givenchy showcased their A/W12-3 collection featuring bejeweled septum rings, everyone was wondering how far one would go to accessorize their nose this fall. Has simply hanging things off your ears lost its luster that we need to find more orifices to dangle jewelry? The answer is yes we do (but lets steer away from the word 'orifice' from now on). I was hesitant in making this purchase due to its omnipresent quality, but if there is even the slightest chance I'm meeting Riccardo in the next two months or so, I'd like to be nasally prepared for our encounter. Though it may seem that this would cause some discomfort, this little piece of craftsmanship is surprisingly comfy to slide on and keep on. The annoying thing is just that I just keep picturing the dreaded scenario of myself sneezing in public, hoping it would stay on whilst I compose myself. Fingers-crossed that when this does happen, I don't end up coating my nose ring in unmentionable nasal secretions. Oh god, perish the thought ladies and gentlemen.

septum ring GIVENCHY

KILTS on STILTS

YES! I finally passed my driver's exam! Which is bad news for people who do drive since I'm reckless and like to speed (and Asian... just kidding... not really). The scary thing is I know how dangerous a driver I can be and they still gave me a license. Just imagine the daily influx of newly licensed accident-prone mental drivers that are swooshing by grandma Ruth and little Emily. Oh the carnage.....

On a lighter subject (since the last one died), before leaving London, I visited every possible store in town that carried Givenchy in search for the SS12 ready-to-wear men's pleated kilt, hoping that since no one bought them at full price, one or two might still be hanging quietly on the racks under the holy sign "Sale". And as I expected, it was sold out. Every single one of them, the moment they were put on sale, they evaporated due to excessive awesomeness. So who'd known that while sifting through the sale racks in Lane Crawford back in Hong Kong, that I found two pairs (black and beige) that were both in my size. Surprisingly my first kilts/skirts that I owned were in beige and grey, whereas most guys would start off with a black one, so it was not a tough decision to go for it. They're perfect even for summery days, talk about ventilation! This gave new meaning to the phrase "easy breezy" (lift your kilt and be teasy).

 top, necklace, earring & kilt GIVENCHY, shoes SUBSTITUTE

photographed by Shin Himn

Urban Aztec

Catching up with mates, gulping down proper food and getting foot massages does put me in a jolly mood. I agree five consecutive days of getting massages did seem a tee bit excessive, then again isn't that what they do at SPA getaways? While I loitered around the Peak (highest point of Central overlooking the whole city), I've almost forgotten how beautiful Hong Kong can be during both day and night. And since everything is so vertical here, I've been especially loving to dig out the hidden cafes, restaurants and shisha bars (most are newly renovated and equipped with open terraces) all the way up in those vintage looking architectures providing different viewpoints of the town. But the one main downside is that I'm not too fond of the conformist clubbing scene, but the good thing is that there's so much to do in the city that when people talk about 'nightlife', you hardly first jump to only clubbing.

sunglasses HENRY HOLLAND for LESPECS, earcuff ASOS, top TOPMAN, necklace & leggings TOPSHOP, shorts GIVENCHY, clutch EBAY, bracelets LN-CC

photographed by Callie G.

More Peonies

Completely unrelated from my last post of Celine peonies, I coincidentally assisted a friend on a film shoot also featuring Celine's SS12 peony print suit a few days before I left London. This time, it was 2D & 3D as actual peonies flowers were used to create accessories that play quite an essential role to the movie (I assume I'm obliged to not spill all the details just yet). The challenging part was working with fresh flowers that had to be manipulated quite quickly before they began to whither since artificial flowers would have ruined the film due to its lack of authenticity. 'Perfectionism' was needed for this project (and professionalism). All I can really say was that it was great fun working with the whole creative team, watching the whole concept that originated months ago from a simple PDF file which developed and finally came to life.

oh yeah.. wearing floral print while working with florals, it's all about channeling your inner-flower-power

from 2D to 3D peonies

thanks everyone at the team for a wonderful time

concept Mathius

film Annick Wolfers